Screenwriters: Avoid the (Screenwriting) Porn

Over the years, many of my colleagues in representation, development and productions have been kind enough to humor me and ask me for my two cents on material they are developing, producing or considering taking out into the marketplace. And equally, over the years, many have gotten in the habit of sending me material, only to follow up a week or two later and ask: “So… is it porn?”

Now I know that the interweb has been a bit fussy lately, so before I go any further, let’s clear up one thing: I AM NOT BEING LITERAL HERE. I am not utilizing the term porn in regards to material brimming with sexual content. I am using the term regarding the exploitation of any non-story based content, strung together with plot as thin as lace trim. What do I mean? In this context, porn is not about sex scenes. It refers to scripts that use little character work or plot in order to justify total indulgence. Over the years, I’ve read all kinds of non-sexual porn: submersion porn (action on a submarine anyone?); dance club porn (they break into dance all the time, or on occasion they talk us into the next dance sequence); action porn (shit blows up and blows up and blows up in towers, on freeways, in airports, you name it); military sniper porn (lots of people can be killed in 120 pages). You get the picture: scripts set in a particular world or displaying specific (and endless) set pieces with little to no story to actually move the film along or inform our protagonist’s actions, with just a few loosely placed pieces of dialogue to string the material together and explain to us what the hell is going on.

Now before you swear that you never write non-sexual porn, let me just share with you one simple fact: I’ve seen this sort of work from the highest levels. Managers coming to me with a working writer’s script to find out if their instincts are right or wrong. Producers who’ve been out there with material (once again, pro-writer produced) that they can’t seem to get money for. So in my book, no writer is beyond writing the screenplay equivalent of non-sexual porn. Between you and me, most every writer has a sandbox they are DYING to play in, the sheer joy of which might make them forget all the rules.

Alright, I’ve said it a bunch of times now: screenplay equivalent of porn. Non-sexual porn. But what am I really talking about? What does it really mean to write the non-sexual, screenplay equivalent of porn?

  • Complete and utter lack of character work

A non-porn script should always deliver on the character level. If your screenplay answers the questions, “What does my protagonist want? What’s getting in his/her way? What’s at stake for him/her?” then you are likely half way there. Screenplay porn usually answers these questions in only the most basic way – if at all – usually in line of dialogue or two that then easily gets discarded and forgotten as our characters traipse through whatever world they’ve been planted in, serving the fantasies of the writer and the writer alone as they themselves lack the foundation for real character motivation that would then drive the plot along.

  • What plot?

One of the main characteristics of porn is that – let’s not kid ourselves – there’s really no plot. Things just sort of tend to happen with out much rhyme, reason or logic. Usually because of something a character said right before that thing that happened happened. This usually points right back to character: if there is no goal, if there are no stakes, then usually you will find that there is little to no organic plot. You can forget about plot progressions and escalations, too.

  • You’ve got to have heart

Porn, as a rule, has little to no heart because the heart strings are not exactly what it is looking to tickle. Therefore, if you want to write non-porn, your work has to have heart. Whether it’s the themes your work touches on or the internal journey of your character, the wound displayed or the fear confronted, this is where the heart of the piece lies and what we as an audience forever connect to. We don’t root for Bradley Cooper in Silver Lining Playbook because he kicked ass in some random dance competition; we cheer for him because he conquered the crazy, and found the best version of himself in the process. He went from living in fear to living courageously.

Now to be clear, I have nothing against a good action movie. I love movies like Independence Day and Die Hard and The Matrix, but that’s not because they’ve got a few exciting action sequences going for them. All of them have strong characters with clear goals and corresponding, escalating obstacles. All of them take their characters through some sort of significant transformation, and all of them are effective on a lot more than just a “we beat the bad guys” sort of level. And sure, everyone knows all of this in theory. The important thing is that you execute this in practicality. Always ask yourself: “What does my character want? What’s at stake? What’s getting in his/her way?” and as long as the answers to at least two of these three questions stay present and consistent throughout the script, then you can be safe and secure in the knowledge that you have a non-porn screenplay on your hands.